A Thought Before Winter Break

As we bring school to a close before a much-deserved winter break, I wanted to kindly remind us that we may see a spike in challenging behaviors this week. For some of our students, school is the place where they feel the most safe, so the anticipation of a looming winter break can be overwhelming.

I’ve hesitated to write about this.

But I think it’s important to share.

I grew up with a brother who exhibited very challenging and violent behaviors. I slept with my bedroom door locked at night because I didn’t feel safe. We had to call the police on multiple occasions, and I can still remember how I felt when he chased my mom and me through the house with a kitchen knife. I often worried about the safety of our animals because on one occasion, as I stood there helpless, he forcefully threw my gerbil against the wall. The gerbil died instantly.

This trauma paired with fear of my abusive stepfather pushed me to get involved in as many extracurricular activities as possible. Being away from home felt more predictable and calm than being at home many times.

So, please give a little extra love this week. Please try to extend a little grace. There are little hearts and minds who are worried about what will happen while they are away from school. Sometimes attention seeking behavior is actually connection seeking behavior. And an escalated adult cannot deescalate a child.

The holidays are a beautiful and also painful time for some.

So, let’s make school as kind and as gentle and as loving as we can this week.

As I say in Legacy of Learning, “The world can be harsh. Perhaps instead of preparing out students for the harsh realities of this world, we should instead equip them to create a kinder, gentler world-a better world. And perhaps the best way to do that is to make school even better than the world outside of school. That way, our students can see what’s possible, and they’ll understand the kind of world they want to create.”