Less Rush More Relationship

Educators know how valuable it can be to spend time supporting students at extracurricular activities. Seeing students in their element, participating in the arts, sports, and clubs which reflect their interests and passions is a great way to learn more about students, see them in another light, and observe their humanity more deeply.

What we seem to talk less about in education, however, is how valuable it can be to see the adults in those same settings. Both the educators who go out of their way to coach and supervise these events and also those attending and supporting.

As someone new to a role and school district, more relaxed and informal settings provide valuable opportunities to talk to and learn about others.

There is something about being outside in a pair of shorts and sneakers, shoulder to shoulder, watching students sing, play instruments, or participate in sports that allows for conversations to flow more naturally and freely. We set our titles and formalities aside (at least a little bit) and just talk. As people. Human to human. We talk about our families, how the work feels, our hopes, and when we don’t know what to talk about, we talk about the event we are attending and the students we are there to support.

We see a different side of our students at after school events, but we see each other in a new light too.

Thank you to the countless adults both educators and families who make the “second shift” of the school day possible for kids. The amount of time and energy spent in these settings is incredibly generous and special.

I’ve often wondered what it would look like to create more experiences that feel like the after school experience – during the school day. I included some thoughts and ideas in Legacy of Learning.

Many of us light up when the school day ends and after school events begin. I’m sure there are many reasons for this. We certainly feel the pressure of academic standards and performance measures. What does it look like to maintain high expectations for student learning while also creating experiences that make us all excited to come to school every day?

Schools and learning need more humanity not less. Meaningful learning is messy at times and imperfect. Meaningful learning keeps humans at the center. We don’t have to organize huge gestures, and we don’t have to plan big events to make our school days a little more fun and relational. We can move small. I like to call them “mosquito moves.”

I was recently talking to a team of educators who were rumbling with school goals. We decided that before jumping into academic goals, we needed to first ensure that we knew everyone’s name. And everyone knew each other’s names. We talked about strategies for simply seeing others deeply and strategies for uncovering and celebrating strengths.

We make things complicated in education sometimes. We don’t do it on purpose. It happens when we are overwhelmed by external and internal pressures.

But of all of the things we need to do and get right, the most important element of our work that we have to be thoughtful about nurturing is our relationships.

Relationships are everything. Our relationships with others and with ourselves.

And maybe that’s what makes the second shift so special. We tend to slow down a little. No bell schedule to shuffle us through it. We chat casually during the team warm-up or during intermission. Shoulder to shoulder, we take a breath and stand in the present with each other.

Less rush and more relationship nurtures reflection which can lead to learning.

We can figure the rest out together if we get this part right.